motherhood. is. hard.
Does it have to be painfully hard? As hard as it has been for me lately? No.
One thing I have come to find is that motherhood is hard on it's own. You are molding and nurturing a life, so yes it has it's moments. But I have made it infinitely harder than it needs to be.
How?
By forgetting what motherhood really is about.
I set myself up in a dangerous trap, by comparing and competing with popular mommy bloggers. And then I made it worse- I started competing and comparing myself to mothers who surrounded me.
I told myself that motherhood was waking up at 6am, working out, showering and getting stylishly dressed complete with flawless hair and makeup. Motherhood was toting around your equally stylish and well behaved kid all around town. Motherhood was teaching your baby how to walk and do sign language by 10 months. Motherhood was keeping a perfectly clean and organized home. Motherhood was taking pictures of all of those things and blogging about it.
The reality?
Motherhood is waking up at 6:30 to feed your kid, only to go back to sleep because you are exhausted from the day before. Motherhood is throwing on whatever t-shirt you can find.. although they are all stained, you prefer to pick the one with puke stains over poop stains. Motherhood is not dressing up your kid in anything fancy- for knowing all too well that they are going to ruin it one way or the other, and plus, those cute little loafers that you bought don't even stay on his dang feet. Motherhood is keeping your kids entertained, fed, and happy. And by so doing the house takes a beating.
When you're a mother- it's easy to feel like you are failing.
But why do we ever feel that way?
It is because we start comparing.
"Their kid doesn't do that" "Well she does this, why can't I?"
And almost 100% of the time, we are comparing our weaknesses to someone else's highlight reels.
Don't. Do. That.
Don't make your job harder than it is by setting up unrealistic expectations for yourself.
I have lost many moments that could have been wonderful and precious, by setting up the mental block in my mind that I was doing less than what someone else does, therefore that moment wasn't anything special- when really... it was!
YOU are enough. What YOU are DOING is enough. YOU are NOT failing.
Motherhood is the greatest and most important occupation one can have- we are raising the future generation. Future missionaries, future seminary teachers, future prophets and apostles. And there is a certain someone that knows if He can get into our heads and make us feel like we are failing and make us feel inferior and insecure- that it will effect those little ones too. And he will use that to seep into our homes. Into our minds. and into our families.
Don't give him an inch.
Motherhood is about just that. Motherhood. Being a mother. Nurturing and caring and teaching these children. Nowhere in the Proclamation to the Family did God command us to be picture perfect mothers and post on Instagram about it. Remember what motherhood is really about. Remember what your focus really is.
And you will find not only that you aren't failing, but that you are doing a really really good job.