It's 9:43 PM and I get to wait on our glorious laundry. My eyes are heavier than an elephant on a Mickey- D's only diet. I'm trying so hard not to fall asleep right now! How is it that after the hardest and longest day ever.. I don't get to go to bed early.. and get stuck waiting on laundry? Anyway...
10-30: Describe your most embarrassing moment.
Oh gosh. It's hard describing embarrassing moments because I mostly don't think they're embarrassing. I learned to laugh at myself and so all of my moments that should be "embarrassing" I actually just think are really funny. But there is one "embarrassing" moment that definitely stands out and takes the cake, even above that one time that I ripped my pants right down the middle in front of the varsity football team (when I was a freshman, no less).
So there was this.. person. A person who I knew I had to impress. A person who I knew I had to win over (at the time). It was important to me that this person accepted me and liked me. Let's call him....Stephen. I felt like I was under lots of pressure, so as you can imagine I was on my very best behavior. Our story takes place during one of the first times that I ever hung out with this person. We were just going around town doing whatever and what not. He actually had made plans to go on a date with a girl who he really cared about.. but she ditched out on him, so he was stuck with me. We drove up to a place where you could see the whole city. It was really pretty and the lights were twinkling and blah, blah, blah. I could tell he was really upset that he got stood up, because he had driven a really long way for that date. He told me that she told him that she loved him. And he loved her too.
Anyway.. long story short it was a messy situation and he was getting screwed. But I knew I still had to get Stephen to like me, so I didn't know whether I should say anything or not.. (because I knew lots of things he didn't know about her). I decided that I'd carefully... carefully tell him what I thought.
So I did. I told him what I thought, and I still remember the exact phrase before it happened.
I said,
"Stephen, if she really loved you.. she'd be here with you right now... not me."
He didn't say anything. The weight of my last words hung heavy in the air. I could tell he knew I was right, and was taking in the gravity of the situation he was in. And that's when I felt it. It was coming. Already on it's way. Oh no, it's so quiet. I don't want to say anything though, because I know he is thinking I'm right. I don't wanna ruin his thought process. Oh shoot. pressure building. What do I do?! Wait, is he crying? No.. he can't be. He's just thinking really hard I guess. Uh oh. This is a big one. Keep it together. Keep it together. It'll go away. No! No.. N..............
***Please insert the sound of an airy, wronchy, stink fart here.***
That wasn't as loud as I thought it'd be.. maybe he didn't hear it. I thought that if I just kept my mouth shut and didn't say or do anything I could play it off as some kind of bug noise. Bug noise? Are you kidding? He knows. He knows that was me. He didn't budge. He didn't move. There he was, still looking as deep in thought as before. You did it. You're safe .He didn't hear it. He doesn't think you're gross. I waited to see if he'd say anything about the girl who stood him up. But then I felt something much, much worse coming. I felt it rising in my throat. Do. Not. You are going to give yourself away!! It was stronger than the pressure I had felt moments before. I tried to choke it down. But it kept rising.. and rising. Until...
I laughed. I've got the maturity of a seven year old because I laughed at my fart.
The good news is, once I started laughing.. Stephen did too. He thought it was just as funny. So we laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed and I even laughed until I cried. It was perfect because not only did it break the ice.. but I knew he liked me and that we were going to be great friends.
And we were! And even after lots of whoo-gee-what-sits happened, we were still friends. He is a dear friend still and is such a great person whom I admire to this day.
So Stephen, if you ever read this... I hope you get a good laugh as you read what happened that night from my point of view!
love,
Carmina Joy