So 30 Things Series here we go!
3-30: "Describe your relationship with your parents"
I feel like this reel of pictures describes how my parents are perfectly!
My dad is a goof, and my mom just laughs at him.
I don't know quite how to describe my relationship with my parents...
Mostly because it's definitely been quite the roller coaster ranging from, "I hate you" to "I am so grateful for you I can't take it."
Well.. let's start with the "I hate you."
Yes, there was a period of time in my life when I "hated" my parents.
Dang those teenagers with all their hormones and under-developed brains.
In my mind, I knew best.
I knew what was good for me. I knew what rules I should and shouldn't have to follow. I knew when I should have to be home. I knew this and I knew that.. I just knew everything.
Which meant....
My parent's didn't know anything.
So all their rules, lectures and punishments were stupid.
All I did was fight with my parents. From the moment I got up in the morning to the second I fell asleep.
It was dumb that my curfew was 10pm and all my friend's were 11. It was dumb that I had parental controls on my phone that made it shut off at 9pm. It was stupid that I couldn't "date" till I was 16 (but I did it anyway.) It was dumb that they wanted "family time" on Saturdays. It was dumb that my friends could go do things I couldn't. . . . blah blah blah.
I couldn't wait to move out. I remember when I was a senior I started packing up my room before school was even out. Before I even knew where I was going..
I remember telling my parents.. "[this many] more months and I'm gone!"
Let's move on..
I finally moved out. I finally was outta there.
It was my first morning in my new apartment in Ephraim, UT. I remember waking up to the unfamiliar sight of the small bedroom I shared. I remember the heart-wrenching pang that hit my chest and made tears swell up in my eyes.
I wanted to go home.
I wanted my parents.
This is where the "I'm so grateful for you I can't stand it" comes in.
I very quickly came to realize all the things my parent's not only did for me.. but what they were doing for me. I would have been nowhere without them.
I realized all the things that they did that I though were "stupid" or "dumb".. they were just doing to protect me... because they loved me. Not because they wanted to make my life miserable (like I thought).
That's also the moment where I think I grew up. My mushy teenager brain developed just a bit more into an adult brain.
So I guess what I could say is...
Kids,
You may "hate" your parents right now. Soon enough, you'll move out too and realize how much you don't hate them.. and how you never really did. Right now those dumb things called "rules" are holding you back. You know what they're holding you back from?
Heartbreak.
Pain.
Mistakes.
So your parents are actually doing you a big favor here. Thank them for caring enough to make rules.
Right now, you probably dream of "getting the heck out of here and starting your own life". Well guess what? You aren't going to get very far with starting your own life without money. And most likely you don't have much of it.. and even if you do.. you're gonna run out quick. So once again.. you'd better learn to appreciate the fact that your parents work from sun up to sun down to pay for things for your spoiled little self.
One last thing...
The time will come when the thought that you never thought you'd think will enter your mind.
Multiple times during my first few months of college life.. I thought that thought too. You know what that thought was?
"Dad, you were right."
When you think that thought that you never thought you'd think.. congratulations. Your mushy teenager brain has grown. Be sure to let your parents know when you come to this realization. I think it might make all those years of them thinking they were failing parents all worth the while.
Parents,
Be patient.
Like I said.. they don't really hate you. They just think they do.
Even though they don't like it.. keep doing what you're doing. The time will come when they too, like me..
finally said...
"You were right."
I love my parents. They gave me my world. I can never repay them. They are the best parents a girl could have. Mom and Papacoppe... I love you. Thanks for making me "hate" you. It just meant you were doing your job. You made me who I am today. And I hope someday I can be as good of parents as you.
Love,
Carmina Joy